9 MUSTs to Create the Life and Relationship of your Dreams

Let’s face it: single parents have it a little harder. It takes a lot out of you to be both parents when your kids are with you. But I don’t want that to stand in your way of feeling like a million bucks!

I’ve been working on a list for you to follow so you can create the life and relationship of your dreams without all the stress and anxiety that you might think would be involved. I am confident in this list, because it’s made up of the exact set of steps I have followed to become the best, the hottest, the most empowered version of myself.

Your turn!

1 – Learn how to manage yourself instead of managing your time.

Managing your time is managing yourself. You can’t manage time because you actually have no control of time. It’s external. But when you manage yourself, you take full accountability for yourself. Managing yourself is managing your energy. This is how we are we become proactive.

Ask yourself these questions to determine if you’re actually managing yourself optimally:

• Did you get enough sleep so you can have a productive day?

• Do you have enough self-control to focus on the important things in your life?

2 – Develop habits and rituals aligned with the life you want to create.

You are your habit. First you shape your habit; then it shapes you. As you develop the habit, you lay down a neurological pathway in the brain that it eventually becomes used to travelling. So the more you do something, the more it becomes automatic, especially if the outcome is pleasurable.

Emotions are incredibly powerful, so surround the habits and rituals that will create the life you want with emotion. The goal is to have habits that make you spiritually, mentally, emotionally and physically aligned to move you into the life you want.

3 – Choose to out Your Inner AWESOME every day

Your inner world is a reflection of your outer world. Internal chaos creates external chaos, and vice versa. When you are angry, you see the world as an angry world, and you attract circumstances and events that reflect the anger in you.

When you become addicted to your internal chaos, you need to do deeper work. That starts with forgiveness. If you don’t learn how to forgive, you will never be able to find inner peace and feel good. Remember the better you feel, the more you are in the zone.

How much inner chaos do you have? Learn how to manage inner chaos to have a better outcome.

4 –  You must have a growth mindset.

With a growth mindset, you see every experience as an opportunity to learn.

With a growth mindset, you have a healthy relationship with failure. Failure can be a painful experience. But it does not define you. It’s a problem to be faced, dealt with, and learned from.

With a growth mindset, you don’t set limits for yourself. You believe in effort. You continuously want to evolve.

You take full accountability for your action and your situation. You don’t blame or shame yourself and others. You practice forgiveness and the art of surrender.

5 – Let go of your comfort zone.

The future can either be an extension or replay of your past or something new that you create.

We don’t usually have a frame of reference for what we want to create. If you want to live in the future, then you have to learn how to be comfortable with the unknown. You need to be courageous to be uncomfortable . . . To create that new thing you have to let go of your past

6 – Focus on what you want to create, not what you want to avoid.

Most people are motivated by moving away from the things that they do not want. They go through life avoiding the things they don’t want. But if you focus on what you don’t want, you are more likely to create it.

Very few are motivated by moving toward what they want. You need both ideas to succeed.

7 – Choose. Don’t decide.

“Decide” implies that you are cutting off other possibilities. “Choose” leaves other options open for later, if necessary.

To stay in control of your life, focus on making “choices” instead of “decisions.”

8 – Balance organization with creativity.

Think about where you could use more structure and where you could use more creativity. If you love to have a plan and stick to the plan, you need to have more creativity. If you are creative, try to have a bit more structure in your life. There is power in paradox! And learning to lean into our opposites is always an adventure!

9 – Make sure to rejuvenate at the mental, emotional and physical level.

The higher the quality of your productivity, the higher the quality of your rejuvenation.

To lower our stress, we most allow our body, our emotions and our mind to rejuvenate. If you want to be productive you have to be good at disconnecting from the work and do things that relax and inspire you, too. You have to channel your willpower to create these habits because what gives us willpower is rejuvenation!

All this is necessary so you can become the next version of you!

You must take your thinking to the next level. You can’t solve significant problems in your life with your current level of thinking. The best way to solve a significant problem is to find someone who is 3, 4, 5, or 10 years further down the road with more experience. They will look at your situation and see an obvious solution.

We can’t see the obvious solutions on our own.

You ARE going to have a paradigm shift. You must take the quantum leap. You must become the next version of you. You must become the next level.

I can help YOU.